you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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