Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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