lets start a swedish sibling band together
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
