My nipple is on Facebook.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
