She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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