That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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