literally had 100 drinks last night.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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