she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
