I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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