Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize