am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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