They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I came so hard my ears popped.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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