I want to walk on stilts...naked
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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