The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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