In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Two words: blizzard sex
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize