its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
