We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
