He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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