Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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