Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
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