wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
