it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
