OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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