Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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