new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
