So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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