whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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