I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
