yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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