Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
