If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
