Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
only if we run a train.
done.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize
