I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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