I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize