His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Panties = found
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