called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I pour the whiskey from now on
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
