I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Randomize
