And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
there is puke in my bra ... again
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