guys are only as good as the porn they watch
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
how do you play pong handcuffed?
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Randomize
