Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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