I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
