Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Randomize