So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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