so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
