I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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