dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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