wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
