I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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