Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Randomize
