We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
