I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
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